


why does my heart cry?

by ImJustPassingThrough



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angst with a kind of happy ending, Crying Shane Madej, El Tango De Roxanne, Jealous Shane Madej, Just Lyrics Used In Coversation, M/M, Moulin Rogue Song, Oblivious Ryan Bergara, Pining Shane Madej, Ryan Bergara Loves Brent Bennett, Shane Madej Loves Ryan Bergara, Sick Metaphors, Swearing, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:20:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27441847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImJustPassingThrough/pseuds/ImJustPassingThrough
Summary: I love you so much, what am I going to doYou left me, you left me in a tangoIn my soul it left meMy heart went awayI have no desire to liveBecause I can't convince youDon't sell yourself Ryan
Relationships: Brent Bennett/Ryan Bergara, Ryan Bergara/Shane Madej
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	why does my heart cry?

**Author's Note:**

> It’s just a short angst I wanted to do.
> 
> Song Lyrics and Title from Moulin Rouge: El Tango De Roxanne.

Shane watched as Ryan and Brent giggle and laughed, he sat too far away to hear what was being said though. Brent had returned a while ago, and while Brent didn’t film Unsolved, he spent all his time with Ryan.

Sure, he and Ryan weren’t dating so there’s no reason to feel... jealous? Is that the right word? Oh hell, who cares? Ryan can be friends with whoever he wants, even if Shane has liked the little guy since he first started working with him. It definitely didn’t piss him off when Brent would place a hand on Ryan’s shoulder, or when Ryan would lean into him. Oh no, not at all.

“You okay, dude?” Sara asked, flopping down next to him.

“Fins.” Shane responded, curtly and snippy, his eyes never leaving Ryan and Brent, who were now looking at something in Ryan’s computer, nothing smiling like there was nothing wrong in the world.

Sara followed her friends gaze and made a loud noise of sudden realisation, “you like Ryan!”

Shane’s head snapped to Sara, so fast that Sara was surprised it didn’t snap off, “shush!” He hissed, “you want him to know or something?” He whispered glaring. Sara made a pitiful face to the tall man, and Shane’s glare turned to one of confusion, “what?”

“Shane, I don’t know how to tell you this but... Ryan and Brent are dating... have been since the first episode.” Sara informed, pity and regret in her voice, and her eyes sad.

Shane fell silent, staring at his friend. There was this awful pain in his chest, as if someone had shot it, and his stomach churned uncomfortably, twisting and turning. He wasn’t sure if he should be sick, or if he should cry.

“W-why didn’t he tell me?” Shane asked, voice small and weak, cracking slightly, as a tear fell from one eye. Guess he went down crying then being sick, which was rather pathetic in his opinion, crying in the office he no longer really worked at anymore.

“Ryan and Brent kept their relationship quiet, never talked about it. I only know because once Brent left, Ryan told me his concerns... it’s clearly turned out alright.”

Shane looked up, at the wrong moment in his eyes, as Ryan and Brent shared a quick kiss, and went on with their lives, as if they hadn’t unintentionally stabbed him in the heart with a knife, then twisted said knife for good measure.

“You don’t think he’ll leave me right?” Shane asked, quietly. He saw that look in Sara’s eyes and quickly added, “I mean, as a friend...”

“He’d never leave you as a friend, Shane.” Sara promised.

He could destroy this crush he had on Ryan, he was sure of it. Certain, even. Right?

~~~~~

In walked Ryan, a red fitted shirt on, and it took all of Shane’s will power to not go ballistic. And it took all his willpower to not turn and vomit when he saw Brent kiss Ryan’s cheek, and seem to compliment his red shirt, as Ryan turned, turning as red as the shirt he was wearing.

He got up and walked away in long strides, looking down, paperwork clutched to his chest, as if to keep the burning feeling for consuming him.

Sara saw him and rushed over, reaching for him, “Shane! Shane, slow down!”

Shane fell onto a chair, far away and isolated from people, besides Sara who sat next to him and held him close, his shoulders shaking.

“Shane, talk to me...”

He looked up to see Ryan and Brent near the desk, and Ryan didn’t even bat an eye to his missing cohost.

“His eyes upon your face...” Shane mumbled, watching as Brent stared at Ryan with soft eyes. “His hand upon your hand...” Brent gently to Ryan’s hand. “His lips caress your skin...” Shane teared up more watching as Brent pressed his lips to Ryan’s knuckles softly. “It's more than I can stand!” Shane admitted, tears rolling freely down his face.

Sara jumped and wiped his eyes with a spare pack of tissues she kept her pocket, “Shane, it’ll be okay...”

Shane looked to Sara, a helpless look in his red, puffy and teary eyes, “Why does my heart cry?” Shane asked, weak and small. “Sara, these are some feelings I can't fight...”

“You have to Shane, you need to! Ryan doesn’t love you like that...” Sara said, regretfully, but her friend had to hear it.

Shane stared at Ryan helpless, eyes soft and full of love, feeling an immense amount of sadness, seeing Ryan not even glance to his seat, just shrugging when Brent pointed to said seat.

“You're free to leave me, but just don't deceive me,” he begged quietly, voice thick with sadness. “And please, believe me when I say I love you...”

~~~~~

Shane was sat on the set for Puppet History, messing with The Professor’s fluff, quietly, in his own world, until he was presented with a coffee, making him look up quickly.

Ryan stood there, holding out the hot beverage, “hey big guy, not seen you in a while.”

Shane instantly smiled, his friend had noticed the lack of him, and he took the coffee, a warm feeling filled him, but not by the beverage, “yeah, been feeling a bit sick, Green around the gill’s. Y’know?”

“Yeah... you sure your up for this? We can hold off until your better.” Ryan said in concern.

“Nah, it’s fine... You and Brent good then?” Shane asked, hesitantly. What did he even want to hear?

Ryan instantly flushed and rubbed the back of his head shyly, “yeah, we’re great...” He smiled, eyes soft.

And Shane realised, it doesn’t matter what he thought. So long as Ryan Bergara was happy, in that gorgeous red fitted shirt, and he was happy with Brent Bennett; he’d shut the fuck up, he’d fight his feelings, and let his heart cry quietly, because Ryan deserved happiness and the world. He just needed Ryan as a friend, in his life.

“Good, real happy for ya, little guy.”


End file.
